What If Nobody Likes Me?
Stop asking this question, please!!!! It is disempowering you and everyone that you utter it to. And I know that many of you ask it every time you think of putting your work out there, your art out there, your book out there.
Here are some thoughts for you to ponder over, so that you can step more fully in to your power.
The most popular people in the world have haters. Look at the new president of the USA. He has his lovers but he has his haters. Gandhi had his haters. Martin Luther King had his. They stayed in the power of love, the only way to counteract the force of hate. When people hate you, love them back. Not always the easiest with some of the people we meet, but these are the very words you would have heard from MLK and Gandhi. You have to love yourself immensely. Not in an arrogant way, but a deep true love and acceptance of who you are. If you do not love yourself, other peoples hatred of you will overpower you. If they hate you because of your skin colour, your sexual persuasion, your academic excellence, then love yourself deeply for these. The ones who have the greatest level and self-esteem love themselves regardless what others think of them.
Somebody may like you today and hate you tomorrow. If you have been following their rules all your life, and decide to live by a higher truth, you may trigger their hatred or their resistance as you change. This does not mean that there is something wrong with you. That is what they would have you believe. If you are listening to your intuition, if you are following the path that you know you are being called to follow, if you are shining the light on darkness in your life or the world, know that this will trigger others who wish to remain ignorant. Carry on regardless.
Be willing to acknowledge your shadow. Sometimes, others may speak the truth of you, and you may not like it. You may react to it. We all have a shadow side, the side of us that is dark, the side of us that we do not want the world to know about us. Blaming others, projecting our anger about it on to the prominent figures in our world, will only cause us to remain stuck in it. We need to fully own it for ourselves, accept that it is part of us, and choose to change it. Welcome the feedback from a coach, mentor, or spiritual guide who has your highest good at heart. If they see your shadow and are sharing it with you out of love, welcome it as a gift on your path. If you don't, you can end up having life experiences where the world shows you quite plainly that it exists within you. Seek out the support of a counsellor or psychotherapist who can help you.
What if people love you? What if people are inspired by you? Ask these questions instead. Because truly, when we are standing in our power, being truly authentic to ourselves, we will attract both lovers and haters. Thank them both, because they are both there to remind us of who we are. The people who have changed the world did not care whether people loved or hated them, they did what they knew they had to do. And none of them were perfect, just ask their families! But they stepped out because they knew it was their highest calling to do so, they did it because they knew in their heart that it was the way love was seeking to express itself through them. They served selflessly, without want of reward or recognition, but willing to accept what came
Love yourself, believe you are a good person. Many of us in the western world have been conditioned to believe that there is something wrong with us. Ideas such as original sin, the idea that we are as guilty as Adam and Eve, are deeply emblazoned upon the psyche of many of us. We must believe that we are good people if we are to do good things in the world. We must believe that we are doing good in the world, if we are actually to do that. If, deep down, we believe we are sinners and bad people, we can play that out in our lives, and many of our haters may have a good point about us. I believe that we are good people. We have our flaws, we have our darkness or shadow, but if we choose to focus on that, it will only expand within our lives. If instead, we choose to focus on our good qualities, we find that we are able to step out in to the world and make the impact that our hearts desire. Meet the darkness with love, and embrace the light that you are.
"It is our light, not our darkness that scares us."
- Marianne Williamson
You will feel the happiest when you are being authentic to you, when you are clear who you want to become, and being that person in your everyday life. When you conform to the way others want you to be out of the fear that you won't be liked, you end up living in a self created prison. The former path requires greater courage, but to those who follow that deep inner calling the rewards are beyond what they ever imagined.
Have you studied all the strategies of the successful ones, but find yourself holding back, or not having any success? Fear is the biggest stealer of dreams, and those who heckle us only test us. With someone to guide us, someone who has been down a similar path, we can feel more confident about ours.
Coaching is for you if want to tune more into your intuition and ask the questions that will empower you on your path. Gain clarity, overcome inner obstacles and make a difference today. Contact me here to receive a complimentary session.
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